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More NDN Humor!

topic posted Mon, February 20, 2006 - 9:45 PM by  Unsubscribed
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After living on the remote Navajo reservation all his life, an old Navajo man decided it was time to visit the big city.

In one of the stores he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not ever having seen one before, he noticed the image staring back at him
and wondered ....

"How did they find a picture of my father?"

He bought the "'picture", but on the way home he remembered his wife, didn't like his father. So he hung it in the barn.

Every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it. His wife became very suspicious of these many trips to the barn.

One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror.

As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that's the ugly Apache bitch he's runnin' around with."
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  • HA!
    • OH MY GAWD....... that is so funny.... I am sending it to my dad....
      • just like our indin of the week!
        (carolyns' friend)
        • so...therez 4 dudez hangin' out atop the roof of a 27 story building; a east indian, a iraqi, a white, & a indin.
          the iraqi sez,"this iz 4 my people!" & jumpz off!
          the japanese dude sez, "this iz 4 my people!" & jumpz off!
          the indin sez, "this iz 4 my people!" & pushez the white dude off!!!
          • Unsu...
             
            Haha....

            Good joke! Except that why is the east indian dude is still up on the roof? Did he smoke too much hash? And where the hell did the Japanese guy come from? Was he a kamikaze?
            • oops!
              the east indian turned into a japanese!

              definitely 2 much hash!!!
              • bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha.... how messed up....
                • ok...here we go again...not 2 much hash this time! lol! take#2!!!

                  so...there's these 3 white guyz & 3 indin guyz headin' outtta town 4 a conference & a pow-wow.
                  the 3 white guyz each buy a ticket @ the train station.
                  the 3 indin guyz buy only 1.

                  "how all 3 of u gonna travel with 1 ticket?" the white guy asks.
                  "watch & see!" sez the indin.

                  so...they all board the train & the white guyz have a seat; the indinz all go into the bathroom.
                  when the conductor comez by & sez," ticket please", the indin crackz the door & slipz the conductor the ticket.

                  "that'z pretty clever", a white guy tells the indin when they arrive at their destination.

                  on the way back, the white guyz think they'll try the indin trick & buy only 1 ticket.
                  the indinz don't buy any!
                  one white guy asks,"how r u gonna travel with no ticket?"
                  "watch & see!" sez the indin.

                  they all board the train & the white guyz all head into a bathroom.
                  the indinz go into the one next 2 them.

                  soon as the train pullz out, one indin slips outta their bathroom, knocks on the white guyz bathroom door & sez, "ticket please".
  • Unsu...
     
    An NDN woman and a baby went for baby's first check up at an IHS clinic. (Indian Health Service) They were put in an exam room and were waiting for the doctor to come in. The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.

    "Breast-fed" she replied.

    "Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, then pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, he said, "No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk."

    "I know," she said, "I'm his Grandma."
    • hahaha!

      yay 4 good joke tellin'!
      • Unsu...
         
        I try my best. ;)
        • me, too...but i usually try 2 tell a joke after 2 much brew!
          ok...here's one!

          this blonde from NYC was driving across the desert when her car broke down.
          she was in the middle of nowhere...when, finally, an indin came riding by on his pony.

          he offered a ride to the gas station over the hill.
          she jumped on the back of his pony & the indin took off at a gallop, yelling, "ya-hooo!"

          every once in awhile the indin would yell, "ye-hawww!!!, wooo-hooo!, & ya-hooo!"

          finally they arrived at the gas station and she got off the pony.
          "what did ya do to git that indin so riled up?" the attendant asked her.

          "nothing", said the blonde..."i just jumped on his pony & hung on to his saddlehorn."
          the attendant sez, "that indins' pony don't have a saddle!"

          :p
  • Unsu...
     
    A woman is driving toward home in Northern Arizona when she sees a Navajo woman hitchhiking. Because the trip had been long & quiet, she stops the car & the Navajo woman climbs in. During their small talk, the Navajo woman glances surreptitiously at a brown bag on the front seat between them.
    "If you're wondering what's in the bag", offers the woman, "it's a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband."
    The Navajo woman is silent for awhile, nods several times and says, "Good trade".
    • lol!!!
      • i can't believe i actually found an indian today who'd never seen Dances with Wolves



        that's almost as bad as when that one dude asked what "Windwalker" was

        • Unsu...
           
          wow, that's sad. almost as sad as Thomas Builds a Fire seeing it too many times.

          which reminds me..."What's sadder then Indians on t.v.? Indians watchin Indians on t.v."

          just had to throw somethin funny in there since this is the humor thread ;)
        • Windwalker was the first illegal video copy that my father ever made.....

          • An old indin was on his deathbead...he only had hourz to live...suddenly he smellz the scent of frybread wafting into his room.
            Ahhhh...he loved frybread more than anything!
            With his last ounce of strength, he pickz himself up & goez into the kitchen...where his wife is making a fresh batch!
            He reachez for a fresh steaming piece, and, WAP! His wife nailz him in the hand with a big wooden spoon, "Leave them alone", she sez, "those are for the funeral!"
            • Unsu...
               
              Dang... body is not even cold yet!
              • HAHAHAHAHAHAHA-----damn

                that's pretty damn goot (!)

                • difference between a rez dog & a city dog?

                  city dog comes out of the oven COOKED!
                  rez dog comes out & sez, "nice sweat!"
                  • This is the maximum depth. Additional responses will not be threaded.
                    Unsu...
                     
                    ha! good one :D
                    • yeah...i know.
                      HAHAHAHA!
                      stolen from YOU!
                      thanx!
                      • My grandpa came over one day and my mom had made a cake, after eating several pieces. My grandpa said how that was the best chocolate cake frosting he ever ate.... my mom said that we didn't have any frosting so she used the commodity peanut butter and syrup.... my grandpa never ate another piece and didn't talk for a whole day..... I call that Indin Mad....
                        • Unsu...
                           
                          HaHaHaHaHaHa ... So that is what that is! My mom, sisters and myself all do that!!!
                          • HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!YUK!!!
                            • So...this drunk indin walks into a bar & sits down with a HUGE bird on his shoulder.
                              The barkeep asks, "Jeeze, where did you find HIM?!"
                              The bird sez, "At the bar across the street."
                              • Unsu...
                                 
                                Aye.
                                • post!
                                  • so...anybody know any good jokes?

                                    how bout the time the former prez clinton waz in seattle?
                                    hillary wazn't hangin with 'im...so he goez down to the bar to check the action.
                                    he see'z a blonde, brunette, & a redhead...workin grrrz.
                                    he sez to the blonde, "how much baby?"
                                    she sez, " $5000 mr prez...all nite long...anything u want!"
                                    he sez to the brunette, "how much baby?"
                                    she sez, "$10,000 mr. prez...all nite long...anything u want!"
                                    he sez to the redhead, "how much baby?"
                                    she sez, "well, mr. prez...if u can lift my skirt high as my taxez, lower my panties as low as my wages, and fukk me like u do the public, u can have it for nothin'!!!"


                                    HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
                                    • sheeeeeeeiiiiiit (!!)

                                      • chief.

                                        04/24
                                        An old native chief sat in his hut on the rez, smokin' a ceremonial pipe & eyeing 2 fedz sent 2 talk.

                                        "Chief 2 Eaglez", asked one official, " u have seen the white man 4 90 yearz. u've seen his warz & high tech advancez. u've seen 'iz progress...& the damage he'z done.
                                        The Chief nodded in agreement.
                                        The fed continued, "considering all this...in ur opinion, where did the white man go wrong?"

                                        The Chief waited a thotful minute...stared at the fedz...and finally..slowly replied, "when white man found this land, indin'z were runnin' it...no taxez...no debt...plenty buffalo. plenty beaver. woman did all the work. medicine man free. indin man spent all day huntin' & fishin'. all nite fukkin'.

                                        Then the Chief leaned bakk & smiled, "only white man dumb enuf 2 fukk up system like that!"
                                        • This letter was sent to the chief's after the Choctaw Nation had sponsored a luncheon for the Choctaw senior citizens in Idabel, OK. Dorthy Whitedeer,an elder, had received a new radio at the lunch as a door prize, and scribbled out a thank you.

                                          Dear Chief Pyle,


                                          Pi Shali ma! May God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens' luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at an Assisted Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it's nice to know
                                          someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady.
                                          My roommate is 95 and always had her own radio before I received this one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. She is a white lady and hates to hear the Choctaw Hymns that come on every Sunday at 10am, even though I long for them. The other day, her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of little pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I said fuck you.


                                          Thank you for that opportunity.


                                          Sincerely,
                                          Dorthy Whitedeer

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